Whether you’re in the throes of new love, navigating a long-term partnership, or trying to make sense of a situationship, tarot can offer profound clarity. Among the many tarot spreads that offer guidance in the realm of relationships, the Relationship Spread stands out for its balanced, insightful layout. It allows you to view the connection from both your perspective and your partner’s, along with the shared emotional field and potential outcomes. This layout is incredibly helpful for anyone seeking understanding, healing, or reassurance in their love life.
As a professional tarot reader and teacher, I often find that love and connection are the most frequent concerns brought to the cards. When a client sits down and asks, “What’s going on between us?” or “Where is this going?”—this is the spread I turn to. It brings not only answers but a renewed sense of empowerment. In this article, we’ll explore the structure of the Relationship Spread, how to interpret each card position, sample readings, and how to use this spread to deepen your intuitive connection with the tarot and your heart.
What Is the Relationship Tarot Spread?
The Relationship Spread is a six-card layout designed to give insight into a romantic connection. It typically includes the following positions:
- You – Your current role, energy, or feelings in the relationship.
- Your Partner – Their current role, energy, or emotional state.
- The Relationship Itself – The shared energy or dynamic between you.
- Strengths – What is working well, the supportive foundation.
- Weaknesses/Challenges – Areas of friction, misalignment, or miscommunication.
- Potential Outcome/Advice – The trajectory or guidance for the future.
This spread can be adapted depending on the nature of the relationship. While commonly used for romantic situations, it also works well for platonic, familial, or business dynamics. The strength of this layout lies in its ability to uncover both individual energies and the shared field of the relationship, which is where much of the magic (or dysfunction) tends to happen.
When Should You Use the Relationship Spread?
The Relationship Tarot Spread is ideal when:
- You’re trying to understand your partner’s behavior or feelings.
- You want to assess the future of a connection.
- You’re experiencing conflict or emotional distance.
- You’re at a turning point in the relationship (e.g., moving in together, breaking up, committing).
- You’re healing from a past connection and want insight into lingering patterns.
The clarity this spread offers is especially helpful when emotions are high. Sometimes we’re too close to the situation to see it clearly, and the cards can act as an honest mirror, showing us what we might be missing or denying.
How to Prepare for a Relationship Reading
Before laying out the cards, it’s important to ground yourself and be honest about your intentions. This isn’t just about “spying” on someone’s feelings—it’s about inviting the truth with compassion. Take a few deep breaths, center yourself, and ask a clear, focused question.
Some effective question examples:
- “What is the current dynamic between me and [name]?”
- “What does the energy between us look like right now?”
- “How can I better understand our connection?”
- “What do I need to know to move forward in this relationship?”
Shuffle the cards with the question in mind. You may want to cut the deck or allow cards to jump—follow your intuition here. Then, place six cards in a spread that suits you (horizontal, pyramid, or circular—whatever feels right). Write down your impressions, especially your immediate gut responses before diving into deeper interpretations.
Card-by-Card Breakdown and Interpretation
Let’s take a closer look at each position and how you might interpret the cards you draw there:
Card 1: You
This card represents your emotional state, behavior, or mindset within the relationship. Are you approaching the relationship with an open heart, or are you guarded? Are you focused on love, or distracted by fear or outside stressors?
Example: If you pull the Queen of Cups, you may be deeply nurturing and emotionally invested. But if you draw the Eight of Swords, you might be feeling trapped, uncertain, or anxious about your place in the relationship.
Card 2: Your Partner
This position reflects your partner’s current emotional state or attitude toward the relationship. It can show whether they’re open, distant, confused, loving, or somewhere in between. It’s crucial to interpret this card with sensitivity and without projecting too many assumptions.
Example: Knight of Pentacles might show steady, slow-moving commitment. Seven of Cups could suggest emotional overwhelm or indecision. If the Moon appears, they may be confused or hiding their true feelings.
Card 3: The Relationship Itself
Think of this as the energy bubble that forms between you—the “third entity” created by your interactions, emotions, history, and chemistry. It reflects how the relationship feels from the inside.
Example: The Lovers signals a deep, potentially fated connection, while The Tower suggests upheaval or sudden revelations. Justice may indicate a need for balance or karma at play in the relationship.
Card 4: Strengths
This card shows what’s working in your favor—shared values, deep attraction, mutual support, or spiritual connection. It helps to highlight what’s worth holding onto or building upon.
Example: Three of Pentacles indicates good teamwork and shared goals. Six of Cups suggests emotional familiarity and kindness. Temperance points to balance, healing, and emotional regulation.
Card 5: Weaknesses or Challenges
No relationship is perfect. This card shows where the tension lies. It may point to poor communication, fear of commitment, old wounds, jealousy, or misalignment.
Example: Five of Swords suggests conflict or manipulation. Devil warns of toxic attachment or obsession. Four of Pentacles may reflect fear of vulnerability or control issues.
Card 6: Outcome or Advice
This card offers a glimpse of where things may be headed—or what you’re being guided to do. It’s not a guarantee, but a strong suggestion based on current energies. It may urge action, patience, or letting go.
Example: Two of Cups promises reconciliation or deepening love. Death may suggest necessary transformation or ending. The Star provides hope and spiritual renewal.
A Sample Relationship Tarot Reading
Let’s say a querent asks, “What’s going on between me and my ex? We’ve been talking again, and I’m confused.”
They pull:
- You – Nine of Wands: You’re cautious and emotionally guarded, possibly wounded from the past.
- Partner – Knight of Cups: Romantic and emotionally expressive, possibly looking to rekindle.
- The Relationship – Judgement: There’s an opportunity for reconciliation or deep reflection.
- Strengths – Two of Cups: A strong emotional bond and mutual attraction.
- Challenges – Three of Swords: Lingering heartbreak or unresolved grief.
- Outcome – The World: Potential for closure or starting a new chapter, either together or separately.
This reading shows that both parties have strong emotional energy invested, but past pain is still active. The advice would be to address unresolved hurt openly before beginning again. If both can move toward healing, the relationship has the potential to evolve.
Tips for Reading the Relationship Spread with Clarity
- Don’t read what you want to see. Be honest with yourself. If you see difficult cards, reflect on what they’re trying to teach you rather than brushing them aside.
- Consider shadow and light. Every card has nuance. Even cards like Death or The Tower bring necessary transformation.
- Pull clarifiers. If you’re stuck on a confusing card, pull one or two additional cards to clarify.
- Journal your spreads. Documenting your readings helps you see patterns over time—and often, the meaning of a card becomes clearer after some reflection.
Relationship Tarot Spread FAQs
Can I use this spread if I’m not in a committed relationship?
Absolutely. It’s helpful for all relationship types, including crushes, situationships, exes, or potential connections.
What if I don’t like the outcome card?
Tarot reflects the current energy—it’s not fixed fate. If you don’t like the projected outcome, the cards empower you to shift the energy through awareness and choice.
Is this spread okay for same-sex or non-traditional partnerships?
Yes, tarot is inclusive. This spread is focused on energy, not gender or structure.
Can I use this spread to read about someone who doesn’t know I’m reading for them?
You can, but it’s best approached ethically and with the intent to understand rather than control. Focus the spread on your side of the connection and mutual energy rather than trying to “invade” someone’s thoughts.
Final Thoughts: Why the Relationship Spread Matters
The Relationship Tarot Spread is one of the most emotionally resonant tools in a reader’s toolkit. It doesn’t just tell you if someone loves you or if things will work out—it tells you why things are the way they are, and what you can do with that truth. It’s a tool of reflection, healing, and conscious choice.
When used with sincerity and openness, this spread can lead to some of the most powerful and eye-opening tarot experiences. Whether it helps you grow closer, set boundaries, or walk away with peace, it will guide you toward what’s true for your heart.